I Wanna Be Free--don't say you love me say you like me

E is my new hero! His friend let him copy 7 CDS worth of Monkees rarities! The Monkees in the studio recording, the Monkees doing a puppet show, the Monkees' demos and oddities--radio spots, commercials, etc.! I am now a happy woman. Sigh.

Well, my voice was still gone today so I went into work and had to whisper. We turned it into something fun, though. My boss whispered back and it made us laugh a lot, it was so ridiculous. Finally I played on her piano while she sang, and some really beautiful stuff came out. That would have never happened had I been healthy. At the end, my boss's dad congratulated me for being such a trooper. It felt good, mushy as that sounds. It felt good because once upon a time I would have been such a sissy I would have tried staying home.

Yesterday was . . . puzzeling. I don't know what's going on with me. I just know that I've never been able to focus: on projects, plans or even people. And it seems I'm not really changing the way I was thinking I was changing. I'm still the same capricious "gamine" (LG's words!) I always was. I like to blame this on my dad sometimes> maybe since he ran around, I started distrusting men and acting crazy. But then I remember that actually I was like this even BEFORE my dad acted the fool, so I'm left with no excuses at all.
Trust me with appointments, trust me with secrets, trust me with an enduring friendship---but never, ever, ever trust me with your heart. :(